Wednesday, July 28

Family

I was blindsided last week.

Long story short I found my “dad.” And by “dad” I really mean “sperm donor” because, let’s be real, supplying genetic material does not a father make. My father is my step-dad. My bio-dad never paid child support, never visited me, never called, never wrote, not even a single birthday card. Ditto for all my paternal grandparents, uncles, and so on. But don’t think that keeps a little girl from wondering, and wishing, and hurting.

When I was a child I longed to find my dad.

When I was a teenager I longed to find my dad and give him a piece of my mind.

When I was a younger adult than now I longed to find him, give him a piece of my mind, and rake him over the coals for never having paid child support.

Then I found that I didn’t care…or, at least, I thought I didn’t care. After all, why on earth should I care about someone who cares not one iota for me? But that zen conclusion was the product of circumstance. I couldn’t find him. And that was that.

Until I “ran into” him on Facebook.

On Facebook.

And it turned my world upside down.

There he was. He was on Facebook, and MySpace too. There were pictures of him, surrounded by his collection of eleven electric guitars. Eleven guitars. Funny, he wasn’t around to help my mother pay for my one clarinet but he could buy himself eleven friggin’ guitars. And there he was, with a different child in his lap. He couldn’t be bothered to make the child that was me a part of his life, but apparently he had room in his life for others.

I freaked out. I was angry. I was sad. I yelled and cursed and cried. I bawled on the phone with my mother.  I vented to Adam. I tweeted about not knowing whether to contact him or not. I exhausted myself with the emotion of it all.

And then I made my decision.

They say you can’t pick your family {with the exception of your spouse}. Well, I’m lucky because, in this case, I can pick my family. I get to choose if this man will be a part of my life, a part of my family. Over two decades ago he chose to not make me part of his family.

And now I’m making the same choice.

There isn’t a good reason in the world to invite a person like that, a person who would desert his own daughter, into my family. There isn’t a good reason in the world I should put myself through the stress, and anxiety, and hurt I’ve been through any longer. And there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell I’m giving him a chance to be a negative influence in my daughter’s life.

He walked out of my life over twenty years ago.

And I’m letting him go.

Forever.

Goodbye…asshole.

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Saturday, July 17

Ice {Cream} Ice {Cream}, Baby!

There really isn’t a decent ice cream place in Medicine Hat, unless you like soft serve…which barely qualifies as ice cream. Having moved here from a town with no less than 6 locations that kept me supplied with really, really good ice cream I haven’t had an easy time adjusting. Just ask Adam, he’ll tell you how much I whined about it.
But last night that all changed. Last night, while driving home from a grocery run I saw something, something that has changed my life, something that made me scream “OH MY GOD!” and grab Adam’s leg, and nearly scare him into a heart attack while he was driving…
THERE IS A NEW COLD STONE CREAMERY INSIDE A TIM HORTON’S!
Apparently they’re testing the market across the country and only four Tim Horton’s in Alberta have Cold Stone ice cream. It’s miraculous that Medicine Hat got one, as opposed to Lethbridge, miraculous and wonderful!
I nearly cried I was so happy.
No, I am not exaggerating.
That is how desperate the ice cream situation has been in this town.
I almost cried.
And today I had a “Love It” sized bowl of cake batter ice cream with yellow cake, sprinkles, and M&Ms mix-ins. It was probably enough calories to fuel Michael Phelps for a day. But it was worth it, I say! Worth. it. YUM.
I had a sample bite of the key lime {which was fantastic by the way}, and next time I think I’ll have to sample the coffee and the chocolate flavors. And herein lies the problem with Cold Stone. There are over 11.5 million possible flavor combinations from which to choose {that’s the actual mathematical statistic, not hyperbole}. People, I am the Queen of Indecisiveness. I could very well end up spending more time trying to decide what flavor to get than I do eating it. But it’s ok. I’m not complaining. I am celebrating because LIFE IS SO MUCH BETTER NOW because I have omgit’ssofreakin’yummy ice cream that isn’t 3 hours away!
My wallet and my waistline are cowering in fear.
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Friday, July 16

Swaps Swaps Everywhere!

I had a blast last year doing the Christmas ornament swap. That’s why I organized the Valentine’s swap this year. But organizing swaps is a lot of work. So I was pretty stoked when I discovered Swap-bot!
Swap-bot is a online service that organizes group swaps and a community of creative individuals. Swap-bot takes the hassle out of participating in group swaps by organizing all of the participant information and doing all of the partner assignments. On Swap-bot, you can host swaps, join swaps, and chat with other swappers from all over the world.
The swaps for Canadians are somewhat limited, but I managed to find a few that look fun. I’m signed up for a Christmas card/recipe/ornament that can fit in a flat envelope swap and a no spending swap. I love getting stuff in the mail, and I love putting together little surprises so I’m on cloud nine.
I’m also participating in this super awesome I Spy squares swap {not on Swap-bot}! If you’ve got kids they’d probably love an I Spy quilt or book. So check it out!
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Do you like doing swaps? What’s the best swap you’ve ever done? Tell me in the comments!
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Thursday, July 15

A Quick Anecdote

Lucy’s vocabulary has exploded lately. We’re often the only ones who can tell what she’s saying, but she is trying. And one of her new words is “bug.”
This morning, lying in bed, she looks up and says, pointing, “Bug! Bug! Bug! Bug!”
I look up.
“Oh my god!” There’s a spider.
A big, ugly, nasty {and did I mention big?} spider. *shudder*
Adam promptly takes care of it {if you know what I mean}, to which Lucy simply replies:
“Bye-bye!”
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Tuesday, July 13

The Year of Sewing

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You all know I have a new-to-me sewing machine. Well I also have a new blog to go with it. I’m aiming to sew, at least a little bit, every day for 365 days. So if you’re into crafty-type things check it out. I’d love to have you follow my sewing adventure. :)
Here’s what I’ve made so far, and there’s much, much, much more to come:

beanbagssewingmachinecover
ricepack

So just click the button and please follow my newest venture. Thanks! :)
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